“This Father’s Day, I’m not sure if I should call my dad. I had the same misgivings a few days ago when it was his birthday. He turned 87. It’s not what you think. I have a wonderful father and we’ve had no falling out. But I anticipate that the phone calls will be more distressing to him than heartwarming.

See, my father has dementia, and this year it’s gotten much worse. He can’t get dressed without supervision, can no longer make his beloved Turkish coffee, cannot recognize that a tissue paper is a tissue paper and sometimes, when he wakes at night, can’t find his way back to his bed. He’s walked out of the house several times and gotten lost (the police helped bring him back).”

Read more from the New York Times here.